WJI 2021, Day 6 PM - The Case of the Haunted Doorknobs

Do haunted doorknobs exist? After six days on the campus of Dordt University in Sioux Center, Iowa, I am almost convinced they do.

The supernatural frightened me from a very young age, thanks to my early obsession with Nancy Drew. I remember receiving my first book from my mother: a 2-in-1 copy of the first two mysteries, The Secret of the Old Clock and The Hidden Staircase. That first book lit a fire which burns to this day. Even at the age of 21, a collection of vintage Nancy Drew novels sits on a small white bookshelf in my North Carolina bedroom. It may not seem impressive, but I promise you it is. One does not simply order vintage Nancy Drew’s on Amazon. It’s a hunt. Collectors like myself become conditioned to spot tell-tale golden-spines in every flea market, antique store and thrift shop. As truffle pigs nose through the forest floor, foraging for their prize, I sniff out Nancy Drew novels nearly everywhere I go.

Thanks to my grooming by Carolyn Keene, I have a predisposition to finding and pondering mysterious happenings. I suspect this is why I seem to be the only one who notices the apparitions plaguing the doors at Dordt. A few days ago, I began noticing that whenever I went to open a door, the handle seemed to already be warm. This occurred in about 40% of the doors I opened. I haven't run a statistical regression on my estimated data, but this feels statistically significant and not a simple fluke. Metal handles do tend to be good conductors of heat, but can they trap that much heat? That for the 1-2 seconds I hold a door handle, I have time to register that it’s as warm as, or warmer than, 98.6 degrees? Considering we’ve been working 12-14 hour days for little under a week, perhaps I’m simply hallucinating from lack of sleep.

Upon realizing this anomaly, I decided our instructor, Lee Pitts, must be informed. After sharing my tale, he looked at me with a look of confusion, which is understandable (Reformers don’t believe possession as willingly as other denominations). He jokingly quipped “Didn’t you know we have heated door knobs?” Considering we’re in Iowa, I believed him for approximately 1.5 seconds. Hanging my head in defeat, I left the room to the sound of my peers roaring in laughter. No one else sees this phenomenon, but I’m determined to get to the bottom of it.

Update: I have just been informed that because Dordt doors have electronic locks, the electric mechanism (located close to the handles) tends to generate heat, which is transferred to the handles. So….case closed.

I would say that I’m disappointed, but upon further reflection, I should have seen this coming. Pick up any Nancy Drew novel and the plot never resolves with the sensationalized apparition listed in the title; there’s always a logical explanation with a tangible culprit. In the end, I’ve learned a good lesson both as an investigator and a journalist. First, there’s always an explanation and it’s important not to lose sight of that logic in a sensational narrative.

-Christina Grube